Help for Parenting Transitions

Lately, I've felt myself to be in what I call a "parenting transition".  You know how sometimes you're going along and things seem pretty smooth, pretty simple, and then suddenly nothing you were doing seems to work anymore, and you feel like your family is coming apart at the seams? No, only me?  Well, anyway...

I think it may be due to the start of a new school year and new activities, or maybe it's just plain old GROWING, but we and our kids have felt a bit out of step lately.  (That's a nice way of saying there's been a whole lot of fightin'!)

I decided to go back to some of the parenting books that have stood me in good stead over the years, as well as read some that were new (to me).  

You can see my stack in the photo above.  I thought I'd take a minute to tell you a bit about each one, as much as I can, just in case you find yourself in a parenting transition, either now or in the future.

Do I Get My Allowance Before or After I'm Grounded? by Vanessa Van Petten.  The author of this book calls herself a "youthologist" and is quite young herself.  She writes as someone who is in-between the ages of the teen and the parent.  I've not read the whole book yet, but do like her perspective and her focus on relationship-building.

Seize the Moment, Not Your Teen by Bill Sanders.  I picked this one up because I really like the title.  Too often I get swept away by anger or frustration and lose the opportunity to really connect with my teens.  

Grace Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel.  I have loved this book so far.  This one is definitely from a Christian perspective.  The author emphasizes a tenderness and a coming-alongside that doesn't come so naturally for me.  I need this point of view.

Youth:  The Years from Ten to Sixteen by Arnold Gesell, Frances Ilg and Louise Bates.  This is a much older book and is no longer in print; the copyright in my book is from 1956.  While much of it is outdated, I like that this book is quite comprehensive and detailed.  I have always found the series by these authors on the different ages to be revelatory; this edition is no different.  Best of all, it cover three of my four children!  There is much to take in here, so I read it in small doses.  It's a good resource book.

The Key to Your Child's Heart by Gary Smalley.  This is a classic from back in the 90s.  I've had this book for years (I think my mother-in-law gave it to me before we had children), but had never read the whole thing.  At first, I found it hard to read because it felt like the author was just describing his perfect family, WHICH I DON'T HAVE. Sometimes I find parenting books unbearable because they hold up an impossible standard that just crushes me.  But as I read further, I saw that the author does NOT have perfect family, and he does have some really good suggestions for creating a close-knit family, and for getting closer to kids who may have shut you out.  I liked this one.

Parenting Teens with Love and Logic by Foster Cline and Jim Fay.  I love anything by the Love and Logic people.  I think their ideas make so much sense and REALLY DO WORK if you can discipline yourself to really try.  This is the kind of parenting book to keep on your bedside table and just read a bit every night.  Because we always need help, we always need reminding. 

So there's my reading list, people!  Tell me, what books of resources have you found helpful?  

Get More From Canned Frosting

I read at A Subtle Revelry that you can whip up your store-bought frosting and it will double in just a short time.

I was skeptical but just had to try it.

I started with a Creamy Supreme Classic White frosting from Pillsbury.

Here it is in the bowl before I whipped it:

And after:

Not sure it quite DOUBLED, but it did increase in volume.  I did notice at the grocery store that the same size can of frosting for the whipped version weighed less than the non-whipped version, though not half as much.  So that tells me that this is a legit tip, in theory.  

My only thought is that it isn't doubled, but it is increased (in my experiment anyway).  I just used a regular hand mixer, so it might be different with a stand mixer.  Also I suppose it might have increased even more if I had whipped it longer.

Obviously if you're adding air to it, it's going to fill it out, which should increase the surface area you're able to frost with the same amount of frosting.  

Verdict?  Give it a try if you're in a rush and short on frosting.  Good tip!

Markers on Mugs - Does it Really Work?

I'm always seeing this idea on the internet for using Sharpie markers to personalize a mug.  Great idea, right?  It seems the consensus is that it's a great idea, but it doesn't actually work after the piece has gone through the dishwasher.

I decided to take what seemed like the most logical suggestions and put them together in a major test of various types of markers and their staying power.

My Supplies:

* I used plain rubbing alcohol to clean off a white dollar store plate.  I put a number and a star representing each marker.

Here we have:

1.  Black Sharpie (Original)

2.  Blue Sharpie (Original)

3.  Vitrea 160 Marker (Glossy Finish)

4.  Black Sharpie Laundry Marker

5.  Colored Fabric Marker

6.  Colored Fabric Marker

7.  Every Color From My Dollar Store "Permanent Markers"

* I waited for 24 hours to let it cure.  So far, so good.

* Next, I put the plate into a COLD oven, heated it to 425 degrees, set the timer for 30 minutes AFTER it reached 425. Then I turned the oven off, but left the plate in, to avoid cracks that could result from removing it hot.

When it came out, there had been some changes!

1. Black Sharpie looks okay but has lightened.

2. Blue Sharpie is no longer blue!

3. Vitrea holding up well.

4. Sharpie laundry marker still looks good.

5. Purple fabric marker smeared and lightened.

6. Orange fabric marker smeared and lightened.

7. Dollar store markers - The red is faded but alive, and the black still looks great.  The others all but disappeared.

Next I used a wet Q-tip to try to rub or scratch off the color. The results:

Finally, it was time for a trip through the dishwasher, followed by another round with the Q-tip.  Here's what happened:

The verdict?

I think it's pretty clear.  The Vitrea marker (#3) was the only one that passed all the tests.  This one is made specifically for glass and has another version made for porcelain.  Reviews I read indicated that the porcelain marker tends to clump and that people had good luck using the 160 on plates and mugs.  

According to the directions, this marker should be dishwasher safe WITHOUT putting it in the oven after a few days.

It's fun to find new uses for everyday items, but sometimes specialty items are made for a reason.  The Vitrea pens are NOT expensive, contrary to what I had read online.  You can get them for under $5 at Michael's, and they come in a wide range of colors, in both glossy and frosted finishes.  

And, no, this is not an ad for Vitrea.  I bought the marker with my money and got no compensation at all for this post. I just wanted to see what would work and what wouldn't.  

So now I know.  Then I decided to make something more useful than that ugly plate I experimented on.  

Dollar store mug, Vitrea marker.  Place white label stickers randomly on mug and trace around, then remove the stickers. Next I put little groups of dots randomly around the big dots.  Ta-da!  A fun mug that I KNOW can go in the dishwasher.